Author Topic: Funny Thing I found while browsing the Forums  (Read 1925 times)

Furia Taurina

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Funny Thing I found while browsing the Forums
« on: December 09, 2007, 11:41:43 AM »
Source:
http://www.eve-tribune.com/index.php?no=2_36&page=7

Scius and the Dreadnaught
The tale of the worst pilot in Eve

Many people call themselves great PVPers for a number of reasons. Some point to amazing killboard statistics, while others boast about how many systems their troops have conquered. Others snicker and roam about with dampening warp stabbed ravens and somehow absolutely murder people.

This is not their story.

This is the story of Scius, which upon Friday, August 24 was a proud member of Omen Incorporated, a new corporation that had joined the 0.0 based alliance Exuro Mortis. He was well regarded with a fairly decent corp history stretching back quite a while. He had a pretty fair amount of personal wealth, and could fly a Dreadnaught. A player like this normally would be quite an asset to any alliance.

Nobody knew that he was a complete and utter noob with an account he purchased from a respected veteran. Nobody also knew that heíd be such a world class fuckup.

Early that morning, he flew his faction-equipped Nightmare-class Faction Battleship (With 5 Billion Isk Officer Fittings) into Aunenen, a notoriously dangerous 0.4 security system. He didnít use a scout or even ask what was there. He somehow got caught and killed by a Mothership on the other side after foolishly trying to engage it. Never once did the thought of warping off before the horribly awkward ship could lock and get a warp disruptor on him. Never once did he think of flying back to the gate and going home. He went down like a bitch.

Later, he would comment on it casually onto alliance chat.
[02:21:32] Scius > There's a mothership camp in Aunenen.
[02:23:35 ] Scius > Mr Xtreme
[02:23:43 ] Scius > He has the Nyx.

Okay. Fair enough. Thanks for telling us what was going on 90 jumps from where the rest of the alliance was. We donít care.

[02:23:49] Scius > I went out with my dread and went down shooting.
Ö

http://killboard.eve-triumvirate.com/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=51051
What the fuck!?

This heroic defender of the alliance had apparently become filled with rage at the destruction of his precious faction-fit battleship. He singlehandedly charged a single, unsupported Dreadnaught against a lowsec, completely invincible Mothership. And while he was at it, that Revelation-class Dreadnaught had nothing but cargo expanders in itís low slots.

Flabbergasted, the alliance responded to his actions in throwing away a Capital Ship.
[ 2007.08.24 02:24:34 ] Righteous Fury > you
[ 2007.08.24 02:24:38 ] Righteous Fury > are fucking retarded
[ 2007.08.24 02:24:46 ] Akat > doesnt fucking matter, you dont do that shit
[ 2007.08.24 02:24:46 ] Scius > Why, because I'm not a coward?
[ 2007.08.24 02:24:55 ] Righteous Fury > get out of my fucking alliance, seriously
[ 2007.08.24 02:25:03 ] Righteous Fury > you have won the award for the stupidest shit ever done
[ 2007.08.24 02:25:47 ] Scius > What was I supposed to do after he popped my battleship?
[ 2007.08.24 02:25:49 ] Scius > Just go "ok"
[ 2007.08.24 02:26:13 ] Akat > well you dont throw more isk at them without a support fleet
[ 2007.08.24 02:26:14 ] Yokujin > i agree with RF here m8 =/
[ 2007.08.24 02:26:15 ] Scius > No one wants to come.
[ 2007.08.24 02:26:23 ] Righteous Fury > you know why nobody wants to come?
[ 2007.08.24 02:26:26 ] Righteous Fury > because we are in FOUNTAIN
[ 2007.08.24 02:26:31 ] Righteous Fury > FOUNTAIN IS NOT LONETREK
[ 2007.08.24 02:26:37 ] Righteous Fury > do I need to point you to a fucking map?
[ 2007.08.24 02:26:37 ] Scius > cyno.
[ 2007.08.24 02:27:45 ] Righteous Fury > you intended to kill itÖ
[ 2007.08.24 02:27:47 ] Righteous Fury > with a single dread
[ 2007.08.24 02:27:52 ] Scius > Hardly.
[ 2007.08.24 02:27:54 ] Akat > then what exactly did you "intend" to do?
[ 2007.08.24 02:28:13 ] Scius > Well, I assumed I would be aided, however, my call was unheard.
[ 2007.08.24 02:28:16 ] Scius > So, I died alone.

Thatís right. He was so upset his ship got taken out, that he expected our whole alliance to suddenly get their capital ships up, make four cynosural jumps down, and engage an enemy, untacklable, E-war immune Super Capital in lowsec. All within three minutes. For those of you who donít do much capital ops, the minimum time for this is easily 30 minutes. Probably closer to an hour. In three minutes, itíd be a bitch to reach him from two systems away, much less 50+.

I am shocked. This man is in my alliance. What was his defense of this blatant stupidity?

[ 2007.08.24 02:28:26 ] Scius > Most alliances I've been in don't take that lightly.
[ 2007.08.24 02:30:59 ] Scius > If you think I am stupid for defending my honor, fine.
[ 2007.08.24 02:35:58 ] Scius > Most alliances would've supported me.

Afterwards, he argued at length that losing 10 Billion isk out of stupitidy is Ďnothingí to him like a mentally disabled child in denial of doing anything wrong. It goes to show how some people just have way too much RL money, going to buy way too much Eve Isk. He blamed the Alliance for being Ďjealousí of his wealth, as he proceeded to buy another Dreadnaught. Presumably, heís going to have that one killed by gate rats or something idiotic later.

[ 2007.08.24 02:39:39 ] Evelgrivion > Evidently, It is our fault that Scius decided to engage a Nyx in low-sec, with a cargo revelation with multiple billions of ISK in modules inside, when we were at minimum 4 cynosural field jumps away from offering backup.

His CEO booted him out of his corp immediately afterwards. For good measure, the guy who referred him to join the corp in question was also booted.

The full unedited Transcript of this Ďsuperbí PVPerís chat can be read here. Trust me, itís ugly, yet hilarious in itís own way. Hats off to you, Scius, for defending our honor by being a complete, but amusing moron.

-Aries Acheron



Antice

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Re: Funny Thing I found while browsing the Forums
« Reply #1 on: December 09, 2007, 03:15:39 PM »
By moradrins hammer.  :o that dude was a true and utter darwin award candidate. i bet he wil kill himself in some incredibly stupid manner soon.   ::)

Reyman

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Re: Funny Thing I found while browsing the Forums
« Reply #2 on: December 10, 2007, 09:35:29 AM »
* Reyman LOLs soooo hard he can't even say anything

after 30 minutes

ah men that was good. the stupidity award of the century went to this guy for sure  :D

btw. Furia thx for posting this great story. you da man :)
« Last Edit: December 10, 2007, 10:05:40 AM by Reyman »

Letri Bimmet

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Re: Funny Thing I found while browsing the Forums
« Reply #3 on: December 10, 2007, 10:01:49 AM »
Honor tank ftw ;D ;D
another EFRON ex director, Yes they are plentyfull around these parts

Ardrent Entaris

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Re: Funny Thing I found while browsing the Forums
« Reply #4 on: December 12, 2007, 01:20:08 AM »
...
Space ships are cool.

JillienRutgers

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Re: Funny Thing I found while browsing the Forums
« Reply #5 on: December 12, 2007, 12:32:21 PM »
OMG, that was hilarious!

I have been laughing over at Battleclinic at the posted fittings for Drones of Annihilation's kills.  Some "vets" have been dual tanking and using civvie gear.  :lol:

Oh, and I am now a moderator at Battleclinic too.  :D

Letri Bimmet

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Re: Funny Thing I found while browsing the Forums
« Reply #6 on: December 12, 2007, 04:42:34 PM »
Oh, and I am now a moderator at Battleclinic too.  :D
Whoa grats jill:)
another EFRON ex director, Yes they are plentyfull around these parts

JillienRutgers

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Re: Funny Thing I found while browsing the Forums
« Reply #7 on: December 12, 2007, 04:48:12 PM »
Thank you very much, Letri!  :D

Barth Crane

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Re: Funny Thing I found while browsing the Forums
« Reply #8 on: December 28, 2007, 10:09:04 PM »
Yeah, I read about that story on SHC some time ago. It was the hilarity of the time as Exuro Mortis think quite a lot of themselves.

To be fair, Exuro has a pretty good reputation, but this guy on his own put quite a dent in it.

Good laugh :)
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